One day I will stop updating everyone on Jacob's sleeping habits...but today is not that day!
I am now the proud parent of a good sleeper. Jacob seems to have taken to sleeping on his own miraculously well and one of the unexpected benefits of his sleeping longer at night is, paradoxically, he sleeps more and more regularly during the day. He is now a good nap taker AND a good night sleeper, and color me continually amazed. As we speak, he is drifting off to sleep for the third time today in his swing, a smile (a real smile, not a gas-induced muscle reflex) on his face. In the past, when he went to sleep during the day, if and when he ever did, he frequently had a frown on his face, even in repose. Turns out he was angry because he was tired!
And I have been reborn. I feel more rested than I have in months, since before Jacob's birth even, since my pregnancy sleep wasn't all that restful in the last trimester. I'm more calm, able to think more rationally, not nearly as desperate about the immediate future, able to plan things once again...in short, I feel key parts of my personality coming back from where they were languishing in an exhaustion-induced haze somewhere deep in my psyche. Welcome back!
I was going to say just then that I felt the old me coming back, but that sentiment, besides being horribly cliche, really isn't accurate. A woman at church on Sunday told me it had been interesting to watch me change, and, at first, I was offended: I'm the same person I've always been, thank you very much, though perhaps a bit more in tune with the needs of mothers and children and using lots of new vocabulary. But later, as I was thinking about her comment, I decided that perhaps she was right. Parts of me have changed, are changing, and the person I'm becoming is someone's mother.