Here are some recent J-isms:
After a discussion about eye color: Mommy and Daddy have eyes just like me. Everybody has eyes just like me.
While smiling winsomely and tugging me in the direction of his bedroom: I love you very much, Mommy. You a nice mommy. Read the book??
During pretty much any song anyone sings, except before naps and bedtime but including during church: No, not that song. Sing Jingle Bells!
While looking out the car window: I see birds flying overhead.
After I came upon him suddenly one day: Mommy, you apprised me!
Upon finding any package outside the front door: Look, a present a me! (He almost always uses "a" instead of "for" and often in place of "to." It's a very Spanish grammatical construction that makes me smile every time.)
After waking up very early one morning, in response to my questioning why he was awake: I hear a noise out my window. I hear bunnies and frogs out my window. Don't worry, Mommy, nothing gonna happen.
While reading a pop-up book in which mice fall into various colors of paint. The mouse in the purple paint is hidden inside the paint splatter, so J pulls the splatter apart and says: Heh-whoa, wittle mouse! (L's are hard.)
When not wanting to stay in his bed for a nap: Mommy, I feel better now! Out, Mommy, out! (Most likely because I tell him he'll feel better after a nap when he has a tantrum.)
At any point when he feels the need to inject a little drama into the situation: What's going to happen?! said with huge eyes and in a very deep, loud voice, so you know it's serious!
Last night when I announced it was bath time: I actually don't need a bath, Mommy.
When he's bored of his portable DVD player: Let's watch something on your big aputer.
At any time during this sizzling summer that we go anywhere, as soon as he's buckled in his car seat and I sit down in the driver's seat, with all the feeling he can muster, from the depths of his soul: WATER!!!